Complaints...

Tired of being told what to do, Tired of my past, Sick of the emotional abuse going on, Sick of stress, Tired of being controlled, Tired of immaturity, Tired of mistakes, Tired of failing, Tired of grades, Tired of losing people to drugs and suicide, Tired of religion, Tired of being emotionally exhausted, Tired of not eating, Tired of not having an appitite, Tired of my heart aching, Tired of being let down. Tired of lies, Tired of putting up with stuff i dont need to be putting up with, Sick of being a druggy, Sick of judgemental people, Sick of being depressed, Sick of not caring, sick of caring, sick of getting hurt over and over again, Tired of Fate, Tired of screaming for help but no one heres me or comes to my rescue, Tired of being pissed all the time, Tired of not letting people in, Tired of drama, Tired of divorce, Sick of relationships, Sick of inconsiderate jerks, I'm tired of that war i fight deep down within myself.

Love is......

Love is burying your dog in the backyard. Love is a ring of fire. Love is watching your dad die in a hospital bed. Love is a rose full of thorns, it may be beautiful sometimes, but its never perfect. Love is insanity. Love is not getting you out of my mind. Love is addiction. Love is hate every once in a while. Love is sadness. Love is a new born baby. Love is intimacy between a husband and a wife. Love is waiting in the emergency room, with your sibling. Love is waiting for a soldier to return home. Love is attending a funeral. Love is beautiful, but its also ugly sometimes. Love is your wedding day. Love is staying with a spouse instead of getting a divorce.  Love is taking a bullet for someone.

Abuse isnt the answer.

I feel like im walking on air, Im floating, im leaving my happy place into an emotional skitzophrenic mind,
I see them all around me, i see the skin falling off their bones, i see the blood the cutts the bruises, i hear the muffled screams, I here the noises the knife makes when it enters the poor victims body, the sound the gun makes when its fired. I dont understand why these horrible things happen. You see this little girl walking down the street, in an old tattered dress, her long dirty ratted hair a mess and her bruised up bloody body, she looks at you with that red puffy tear stained face, she limps towards you, she takes your trembling hand in her fagile black and blue hands, you look into those bloodshot brown eyes, she looks at you pleadingly and begs for you to help her, she says im scared daddies gonna hurt me again tonight, you start to tremble and shake then the tears come out, you cant help her shes already dead. What is it gonna take to stop all this disgusting abuse. When is it gonna get through there freakin heads that were human too? Im so freakin sick of this crap. These people are sick, and if your reading this and your one who is being abused dont be afraid to reach out, I did and it helped me. No one deserves to be treated like that.

I am

1.I am.... Indecisive
2.I am... a Listener
3.I am....moody
4.I am....a helper
5.I am....a clutz
6.I am ...smart
7.I am...selfconcious
8.I am...uneasy
9.I am....beautiful
10.I am...scared
11.I am...emotionally enstable
12.I am....a social butterfly
13.I am..mormon
14.I am...funny
15.I am...angry
16.I am....paranoid
17.I am....skinny
18.I am....abnormal
19.I am...a spaz
20.I am....accepted by most

I walk alone...

I walk alone, down this road of looks and glares, because of their selfish judgements.
I walk this empty hall with nothing, but a pair of ripped jeans, and an old dirty jacket.
I walk alone with that fake smile fake laugh, hiding my true feelings.....I wear a mask.
I walk alone with those memories of muffled screams, bloodshot eyes, tears, fighting, black eyes, people getting hauled off to jail in a police car....people I love.
I walk alone worrying about those people who do drugs and those people who are suicidal ...afraid of them taking their lives one day.
I look in that empty mirror with an empty expression....wondering what happened to the old me, and when the old me will return.
I walk alone down this hall and get sucked into a whirlpool of drama unable to get out before it drowns me into a big emotional reck.
I walk alone through my trials, my own heart aches knowing that they happen for reason....everything happens for a reason.

Im thinking of you.......

I'm thinking of you like dogs think about bacon, like snow thinks about landing on grass, like gummy bears think about being chewed. I'm thinking of you like a cowboy thinks about his boots, like ketchep thinks about fries. I'm thinking about you like Every Freaking second of the day, like women on diets think about chocolate, like guitarists think about music. I'm thinking about you like wrinkles think about your face, like toilets think about toilet paper, like shoes think about feet. I'm thinking about you like basketballs think about hoops, like fishing poles think about fish, like cats think about mice. I'm thinking of you like lungs think of breathing, like lips think about kissing, like arms think about holding , like rings think about fingers. When your thinking about me, you know im thinking about you, cause theres not a thing in this world that can get you out of my mind.

Direct orders: Rock the HECK out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Rock out like you woke up 2 hours before your alarm went off and you get to sleep in more. Rock out like you've just realized the guy you've liked since 7th grade finally likes you back. Rock out like your at a party with kesha! Rock out like the world is never going to end. Rock out like you wont ever die. Rock out like you have just been turned into a sexy vampire.Rock the heck out like you just dont care! Rock out like you just met Avril lavegne, Rock out like he just kissed you. Rock out like its Friday. Rock out like you just got asked out on a date. Rock out like you just jumped off a cliff and survived. Rock out like you just won the lottery. Rock out like Heath ledger didnt really die. Rock out like your at a marylin manson concert. Rock out like its summer again. Rock out like its raining outside. Rock out like your the most attractive person in school. Rock out like you just got accepted into an excellent college. Rock out like you just got a new dog, and its a golden retreiver. Rock out like your having a blast. Rock out like your at a partee! Rock out like you just got asked out by the hottest guy/girl in school! Rock out like its the last day of school! Rock out like your never sad anymore. Rock out like your goin on a date with Shaning Tatum. Rock out like your 18 and your finally movin out.